In Jon M. Chu’s G.I. Joe: Retaliation, the President of the United States (played by Jonathan Pryce), who is actually Zartan in disguise orders the United States military to kill the Joes. During the ambush Duke (played by Channing Tatum) is blown to smithereens while trying to get Flint (played D.J. Cotrona) to safety. So, that should be all for Duke, right? Maybe not. Jon M. Chu recently signed on to direct the next G.I. Joe film tells MTV News there is a shot Duke might rise from the grave.

Just when you thought this franchise couldn’t possibly get any stupider, the director makes a…

“I found something in the goblin tunnels.”

“What did you find?”

...

“My courage”

“Good, you’ll need it.”

The Hobbit trilogy is, I think, perhaps the ultimate fan fiction for the universe surrounding Middle Earth — that is to say, for The Lord of the Rings. Consider: why would one take a book less than 300 pages and make a trilogy out of it where with The Lord of the Rings trilogy, 3 books of about ~400 pages each were made into 3 films? If the same logic was applied to The Lord of the Rings filmmaking as we’re seeing here with The Hobbit, we’d have 9 films, 3 for each book.

So what has…

I think this is supposed to be a bit of a modern day E.T. mixed with a bit of Super 8 (which I still haven’t seen, drat, what’s wrong with me!). It’s interesting that we (I) haven’t heard anything about this film until now. There was a time when films were less well known about when audiences went into the theaters to see them — a time when one could go to the theater and watch E.T. and not know a thing about it. That appears to be a little of what director Dave Green wants for his film Earth to Echo.

Of course this film just has to have that “found footage” vibe that I hate so much,…

Joss Whedon has apparently decided he can’t fool audiences twice. While he neglected to even mention Don Cheadle‘s War Machine character in The Avengers, the character had a much expanded role in Iron Man 3. That means it’s now believed Cheadle’s Col. James ‘Rhodey’ Rhodes, also known as War Machine and Iron Patriot, will play a role in Whedon’s 2015 sequel Avengers: Age of Ultron.

...

UPDATE: Hitfix confirms, saying “Col. Rhodes, aka War Machine, has a key role in the conflict with Ultron that is the main focus of the sequel.”

The question then becomes, what role will Rhodes have in…

One of the surprise delights of last year was the Netflix original series House of Cards. It was a dark political thriller that followed the antics of villain Frank Underwood as he set his sites on the white house. No one and nothing must stand in his way! Kevin Spacey did a phenomenal job making you love to hate such an evil scumbag. The political climate in our country is pretty ripe for such a show given that no one on either side of the political isle is particularly fond of their politicians. Indeed I think the consensus is that with few exceptions, every single politician currently in…

“I was cleaning the chimney Aunt May! Honest that’s what I was doing” LOLZ. Come on! Tobey Maquire Spider-Man could come up with better excuses than that on his worst day!

Well, okay maybe he couldn’t but that’s not going to stop me from hating on nuSpidey. This film looks like it’s going to be just as messy, self important, and stupid as the first Amazing Spider-Man. Andrew Garfield is a usurper, that’s all there is to it!

But we might as well get used to the idea of more Amazing Spider-Man because Sony does not seem interested in making a trilogy, or a certain set of films, or whatever.…

Warner Bros. has dated “Pan,” its Peter Pan origin tale, for June 26, 2015.

Joe Wright is attached to direct from the Jason Fuchs script but the 3D film has not yet been cast with shooting planned for April. Plot details are being kept under wraps, but the pic is certain to bring back the characters created by Scottish novelist and playwright J. M. Barrie about a boy who can fly and never ages.

Wright adapted “Pride and Prejudice” and “Anna Karenina.”

Hmm. Okay. I know I tend to say this about new films sometimes but, did we really need this? I don’t think I need it.

You know, regardless of your feelings about the first installment in this trilogy, you’re probably going to see it at some point. Good or bad, for better or worse, The Hobbit films are/will be a cultural phenomenon. And there’s certainly far worse things in the world.

But a Tolkien adaptation is not your only new option this week… well actually that depends. Saving Mr. Banks is in limited release this weekend. I can’t actually figure out where it’s playing but who knows, maybe it’s somewhere near you.

New This Weekend

The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug — PG-13

If you were keeping up…

This week we got our mid-season cliff-hanger for Agents of SHIELD, and it looks like when the show returns, we are finally going to get some answers on what happened to Coulson between his “death” in The Avengers, and his weekly appearance in Agents of SHIELD. But don’t take my phrasing for complaining, I’m actually happy with the suspense and the hints that have continually been dropped about what’s been going on with Coulson. I still have my suspicions as to what it might be, and whether I’m right or wrong, I should be happy. And of course there’s the possibility that we still won’t get the…