TRON: Legacy — Review

4 of 5 stars
TRON: Legacy

Perhaps the most unappreciated blockbuster success of 2010, Disney’s live action sci-fi/fantasy is a faithful continuation of the TRON franchise with returning cast members and filmmakers. It boasts state-of-the-art computer animation set in live action; a film rich with drama, low on clichés.

Let’s get one thing out of the way: I missed The Matrix craze.

My parents were very restrictive, so they wouldn’t dream of showing an R rated film to me as an adolescent. Since I was severed from a great number of science fictionals as a result, I started to explore the wonderful world of the…

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Chad Didn’t Like ParaNorman

Chad Didn’t Like ParaNorman
Chad Likes Movies

Chad, friend of the site:

I think that ParaNorman is a movie that suffers from poor characters, lame humor, and a lackluster script. While it does contain positive messages about finding the good in people around you, not bullying others because they are different, and being who you are no matter what others say, it’s just not a film that I would recommend.

So did he like it or didn’t he? I’m having a hard time telling…

Seriously though, this sounds about like what I would have expected and frankly, the high ratings from critics confused me as well.

District 9 — Review

5 of 5 stars
District 9

It’s been twenty-eight years since aliens made first contact, but they didn’t come as saviors, rulers, or destroyers (sorry, Mr. Wells). They came as refugees.

Unwelcome Guests

In 1982, a massive spacecraft stops directly above the South African city of Johannesburg, bearing in its belly the sickly remnants of an alien race. The aliens – disdainfully referred to as “prawns” - are exiled to District 9, a rigid containment zone on the fringes of Jo’burg, while world leaders argue about how to handle their unearthly visitors. Years go by with no decision reached, and as human-alien…

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Downfall — Review

4.5 of 5 stars

Let it be said here and now that this film brought me to tears on more than one occasion — not because I cared about the stars of this film (such as Adolf Hitler), but because of the shear senselessness and moral depravity that could move men to do what the Nazis did. A particular scene involving the murder of children was perhaps the most difficult for me.

It is not a film I will ever see again for I have no desire to see it again. Yet it must be highly rated, praised even, for that which it accomplishes in its viewing. It is a film that everyone should see I think. For this film…

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John McClane Can Hardly Die — Review

1.5 of 5 stars
John McClane Can Hardly Die

Remember Hans Gruber, Simon Gruber, Col, Stuart, and even Thomas Gabriel as the baddies in the previous four Die Hard Films? Well don’t go looking for the likes of them here because you will be disappointed. Also remember how John McClane was a blunt but intelligent weapon of the law, and how he cared what happened to the people around him? That’s gone from this film too.

Oh, and remember how the plots of the previous films made sense, simple though the plots were? Well don’t expect everything to make sense this time out, because it’s not going to.

A lot of elements just didn’t add up…

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Identity Thief — Review

1.5 of 5 stars
Identity Thief

Identity thief suffers from a fundamental flaw. On the one hand, it wants to be a funny and non-serious film full of slapstick humor and cartoony violence that would hospitalize real world people. On the other hand it wants to be taken as a serious drama at other points of the film. While this has been done before, and has even worked for some films, it fails miserably here. Doing a film in the manner I have described, like having your cake and eating it too, is very tricky business.

Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire

Diana (Melissa McCarthy) is established as the identity thief here, she’s…

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Star Wars: Episode IV - A New Hope — Review

5 of 5 stars
Star Wars: Episode IV - A New Hope

In keeping with the theme of Favorite Fun Futon Films for February (FFFFfF), we are reviewing classics — old and new — that ring true for us. These are carefully selected from the grand archives of film, and we wish to respectfully grace them with our reviews as fans.

We could write about any number of favorite films for home viewing, but a month isn’t long enough to hit more than a handful. We are focusing on the ones we have time to address thoroughly at the risk of appearing like nutty fans for these films. But, hey, if you aren’t nutty about something, then you have never lived!


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Warm Bodies — Review

2 of 5 stars
Warm Bodies

What’s wrong with me? I just want to connect. Why can’t I connect with people? Oh, right, it’s cause I’m dead. I shouldn’t be so hard on myself, I mean, we’re all dead. This girl’s dead. That guy’s dead. That guy in the corner is definitely dead. These guys look awful.

I had to do a double take when I looked at the Tomato Meter at Rotten Tomatoes. As of this writing it is averaging a 77% approval rating from the critics and an 83% from the audience. That’s… weird. Maybe it’s not surprising that the audience rated it so highly, given that there is not a whole lot of good happening in the…

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The Playlist Reviews ‘Parker’

The Playlist Reviews ‘Parker’
The Playlist

But under the direction of journeyman filmmaker Taylor Hackford, who is an underrated visual stylist and has done everything from the top tier Stephen King adaptation “Dolores Claiborne” and lawyerly monster mash “The Devil’s Advocate” to earnest ‘80s tearjerkers like “An Officer and a Gentlemen” and “Against All Odds” to the Oscar honored “Ray,” “Parker” totally sags. It’s a visual muddle, indistinguishable from your average low-budget cop show and lacking in any kind of flair or dynamism (save for some “Panic Room”-ish title cards), which it should absolutely indulge in since in crime…

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Parker — Review

1.5 of 5 stars

Father Parker, as we are introduced to him during his first robbery of the movie, is quite a devout criminal… with principles.

“Don’t steal from people that can’t afford it,” Parker tells us. “Don’t hurt people that don’t deserve it. …Most importantly, if you say you will do something and you don’t, I will make sure you regret it.”

What seems like a heavy-handed spin of the good-bad guy theme that’s popular in cult action films these days only get’s more ridiculous when Parker dawns a white ten-gallon cowboy hat and chases down the thugs that left him for dead to steal back what was…

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